Like most things in my life, my yoga journey hasn’t been a smooth, seamless journey. Though practicing yoga for most of my adult life, I didn’t take the leap to becoming a yoga teacher until I was in my 40s.
I had reasons-not enough time, not enough money, not fit enough, not skinny enough, not flexible enough……..See a theme here? Perhaps the translation is I thought ‘I was not enough’.
And sometimes that is what holds us back the most in many things-our own thinking.
I confess I went into my yoga teacher training full of fear, but determination. Sometimes fear of the unknown can be the biggest fear. Thankfully, the training I took from Namaskar Yoga in Saskatoon, Saskatchewan was a welcoming and inclusive environment where all students learned right away we had nothing to fear. In the loving, capable space of Kathleen and Doug we were able to grow and develop on our very own personal yoga journey. Not only did we learn asanas and pranayama, we discovered within ourselves our personal path.
I took these trainings for a weekend every month or two. As I was nearing the end of my training, regret began to creep in. “Why didn’t I do this sooner,” I asked myself. “You should have done this decades ago,” I scolded.
Quickly, I redirected my thoughts acknowledging that this was my yoga journey and it was how it was meant to be. The classes I took were perfect for my style of learning. While many trainings offer intensive classes in a short period of time, the trainings I took were stretched out to over a year long period. This allowed me time to absorb new lessons, integrate them into my soul and my teaching, and allow the knowledge to deepen within me. The people I have met through my training were people I was supposed to meet, become friends with and learn from.
I write this to let you know that you are not alone. Perhaps you are beginning a yoga journey of your own, or somewhere along your personal yoga path. Perhaps sometimes you feel fear, or regret that you didn’t do things sooner or different. I hope it gives you some comfort in knowing that yoga teachers also have these same feelings.
As I take a deep breath in, and a deep breath out, I invite you to do the same. Maybe a moment and a breath is your yoga today. Maybe trying a pose is your yoga. Maybe looking into nearby classes is your yoga. Maybe taking a step outside, noticing the summer day and taking a breath is your yoga. Whatever your yoga is today know that it is good, it is perfect and it is your yoga journey, so relax, be kind to yourself and enjoy your yoga today.